An honest look at how full time travel kids gain social skills.
Socializing….so important for people of every age and in every stage. It always surprises me when others believe that if we travel full time we must not have any social life interactions. Throw in homeschooling and we’ve now traveled back in time 100+ years. How on earth could our children learn how to effectively communicate with others if we travel all the time? Sigh….if I had a nickel for every time we’ve been asked “but how do your kids socialize” since starting travel life with our family I’d be sitting pretty, getting fed grapes somewhere on the beach. Instead of asking me how our children manage the acts of socializing, maintaining relationships, and building on those relationships to long lasting friendships, why don’t we just ask them. And that is just what I did. I gave each of my three children a “homeschool assignment” to answer that question. They typed up a couple of paragraphs on their computers and emailed it to me. Below you will find, from the horse’s mouth, how my kids really feel about travel life and making and maintaining friendships while on the road. They share not only their positive thoughts on our nomadic way of life but also some of their insecurities and how they are able to navigate past them and make connections. It has been such an amazing experience sitting back and watching my kids push themselves and overcome their fears.
How our 17 year old son views socializing and travel life
Dakota-Our oldest, at the time of writing this he is 17 years old. He has been shy since he was little. I remember when we had him in private school for kindergarten and his class was putting on a performance for the parents. He was there on stage, face covered with his hands, attempting to mouth the words for his teacher. He absolutely hated being on that stage. My goodness how things have changed.
“Socializing while being a full-time traveling family…..this is one of our most frequently asked questions. One of the best things we do to socialize is meet up with families that are also full-time traveling families. Obviously it’s easier when we can coordinate with other full-time families and make plans to travel together. I know that their kids are homeschooled and therefore we will have something in common to talk about. It makes for an easier conversation starter.” “Personally, I’ve always had a bit of a problem going up to people and meeting them, especially when I was younger. That’s why I was never big on the idea of seeking people out, I prefer to wait till someone comes up to me and introduces themselves. With that being said, the past several years I’ve been pushing myself purposely out of my comfort zone and going up to people to introduce myself. If you are a part of a homeschooled or traveling family I highly recommend doing this. When I took the initiative to go up to them, I found out that they’re just as nervous and unsure as I am. What a relief!” “Another activity that has helped me meet people where I am is by joining a local youth group, even if we are only there for a week. My sister and I have been going to youth groups for years while we’ve been traveling. It is one of our favorite things to do. Every time we’ve gone to youth groups we’ve made amazing friends while there. Several of the friends we’ve met during our travels have turned out to be our best friends, and we met them at church youth groups. We’ve kept in contact through FaceTime, texting, and meetups when we are traveling close to where they are.” “My sister Sydney and I also like to go walking around the campgrounds we’re staying at with our dogs. This allows us to see if there are kids our age and say hello. Of course, sometimes it seems like there are more little kids than teenagers. We start up a conversation with them and will schedule times around schoolwork and sightseeing to hang out.”
“My youngest sister, Aiyana, is very different from me. She is quite the social butterfly. Her personality mirrors my fathers in that way. They both easily meet people everywhere they go. Sydney and I have used that to our advantage and met so many families with teenagers through Aiyana and my father. “How do I like travel life? I don’t like it, I love it. So much so I had my parents take me to the Tampa RV show this year to look for my future camper. That’s right. When I move out, I want to move into a camper and travel. I haven’t always felt this way, but as I’ve gotten older I’ve come to appreciate the lifestyle more and cannot imagine not traveling around.”
How our 15 year old daughter views socializing and travel life
Sydney– My middle child. At the time of writing this she is 2 months shy of 16 years old. Growing up Sydney was always a joy to be around. She has a wonderful personality, and is incredibly funny. Out of all my children she reminds me the most of myself when I was younger. Here are her thoughts.
“Socializing in the RV, for me, can be a bit difficult. I’m not great in the confidence aspect of life, more of a “fake it till you make it” kind of person. I’m working on it. However, my sister is my complete opposite, she’s one of the most confident, loving, and genuinely friendly people I’ve ever met. My family likes to use the phrase, “She’s never met a stranger.” She’s helped me meet so many of my friends. I will always credit her for the friendships I’ve made. Aiyana and my parents have tremendously participated in helping me branch out, which is why my life is filled with so many wonderful and colorful characters.”
“My greatest friends are the ones I didn’t meet myself, it’s the ones my siblings or another friend or family member introduced me to. I have a hard time putting myself out there to meet people, even when I’m around so many. I tend to focus on the things that come easy to me instead of getting out of my comfort zone. Dakota, as crazy as it might sound, has really pushed me to meet more people and I’m so happy he has. It definitely makes it easier when you have a buddy by your side. I’m really glad to have people in my life that build me up and encourage me.” “Wherever we go my family makes a point to get us connected with a local youth group. I’ve gone to so many youth groups, conferences, youth camps, and rv campgrounds that I have made life-long friends at. I’m able to keep in contact with my friends through texting, FaceTime and messenger. Even if we don’t talk for a while we can get together and it’s like we were never apart. We don’t skip a beat. It’s great when we can meet back up in another state or national park and get to hang out for several days. Those days are filled with fun and are so cherished.”
“Back in Florida I have one of my best friends Kinsley, who I met several years ago when we first started living in our motorhome. She was three spots down from me in the RV park. Since that time her family has moved into a home and I love staying with them on occasion and making up for lost time. We will be celebrating my 16th birthday soon on a cruise ship and I am hoping on bringing her along!” “Caitlyn and Aiden are some of our other traveling friends we’ve met. I met them in Florida before we left to go up the Northeast to Maine in 2019. We have visited so many states with them and even spent a month in Montana with their whole family in 2021. We went kayaking and SUP boarding in Glacier National Park and grilled or smoked food with them many times as well. Their dad Brian makes some delicious ribs! That was the best summer!” “In Georgia I have friends that I made while attending a youth group. Their names are Piper, Emma, Rhiley, Alex, Lucy, and Harleigh. In California I have a close friend Abby and several other people I enjoy talking to in an extended friend group. All in all I’m very grateful for the places I’ve been, the people I’ve met, and the friendships I’ve been able to cultivate over the years that have impacted my short life thus far.”
How our 10 year old daughter views socializing and travel life
Aiyana– Our youngest, Aiyana, is the exact replica of Cliff, in looks and personality. She has always been this way. Out of our three children, meeting new people and making fast friends comes the easiest. In everything we do and places we go she has met friends and maintains them to this day. Between texting, FaceTime, and kids messenger she is able to stay in contact even when we are miles away from them. As parents we purposely choose routes that will allow her to stop and visit with her friends on the way to our destination. Here are Aiyana’s thoughts on traveling and socializing.
“There are things I like and dislike about traveling. Some of the things I dislike is the storage space. There is only so much room for stuffed animals, toys, and electronics that I want in the RV. I have to be really picky when making my Christmas list. If there is something cool I want to do I try to ask for that instead of a toy. My mom says “we should prioritize experiences instead of stuff.” If I had a bigger room I could have all the toys I want! Also, we are in Alaska right now and the timezone is 4 hours different than my friends on the East Coast. I don’t like that because when I have time to call them sometimes it’s too late.
“Some of the things I like about traveling is getting to see so many awesome places, hiking with my dog Roxy Lou, and seeing all the wildlife. I would never get to see beluga whales and grizzly bears in the wild in Florida! I love making new friends too! I have met so many wonderful people I get to call my friend. I’ve met them at campgrounds and campfires, church, playgrounds, and other activities I’ve been a part of like Krav Maga.”
Our perspective as parents
As you can see all three of our children have no problem socializing, expressing themselves with words, and meeting new people. In fact, they have met some other great kids at RV parks around the country like the Thousand Trails parks. The great thing about our traveling lifestyle is that our children can socialize comfortably with people of all ages, and find commonality with different cultures. We, as parents, have the privilege of watching our kids grow and mature in various settings and circumstances. They are able to handle changes in their environment and routine, as well as use resources to navigate around people and areas where English is not the native language spoken. They have all done this with ease, compassion, and genuine interest in others and different cultures. We couldn’t be more excited for the individuals they are maturing into or more grateful for having a front row seat to watch it!